Revengecrabs

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http://www.revengecrabs.com/

Send Revenge Crabs To A Friend!

Pubic Lice Is What We Do

In short, we give crabs to your ex-girlfriend. No if’s, not too many and’s, but we promise a very itchy butt. You’ve got an ex, a grudge and a valid credit card with matching billing & shipping addresses, and we’ve got crabs.If you want a way to get back that doesn’t involve permanent damage or risk of personal injury or jail time, you now have a place to turn.

Imagine, if you can, that you have an ex. It might be an ex girlfriend, an ex boyfriend or ex wife or husband. Heck, it can be an ex-fling for all we care, but imagine in this crazy little hypothetical that you have an ex, whatever that may mean to you. Now imagine, if you can imagine it, that you might have some reason why you don’t like this ex of yours. What could you possibly do to get back at him or her? I have an idea, and it’s just so crazy it might work.

Give your ex crabs!

It’s an idea so horrible, regrettable and insulting that you could never directly endorse or request it, and we won’t ask you to. All we do is ask you for your billing and shipping addresses, and mail you out a tidy package of peculiar material with tiny, purple dots in it… those are live crabs, and they need only be sprinkled on the bedding or clothing of the one you once loved the most to ensure he/she sufferers the fullest wrath of those genital lice.

We have a facility in a non-descript, small-town city in upstate New York where we do all of our parasite husbandry and carefully considered selective breeding. You don’t have to “get it” or even “like it”, but just know we’re doing our very best every day to help you get back to where you deserve to be in terms of justice and respect.

If you’ve ever tasted the sweet intoxication of love, you know what it’s like to live…

If you’ve ever fought the bitter battle with the one you’ve pledged to love, you’ve felt our very pain.

If you’ve ever told that whore which cliff to jump off because of all that sleeping around she must be doing, going out dressed like that all the time.

If you’ve ever loved or bedded above your class, but felt bitter, dire resentment when you were abandoned for someone more in keeping with socio economic classing, but still wished there was something you could do to get back at him or her.

We can help

Read our pages, feel our X-Ray vision, and make the only choice that’s left; you must now buy our product of gestational pubic crab eggs, delivered fresh to your door within mere days.

 
Testimonials:

“I’m a shaver so I never thought I’d get crabs. My ex still seeded my bed, and he got me good because my other boyfriend caught them instead of me. I was so embarrassed.” Jessica R. Hilldale, CA

If you savor revenge with a flavor, consider this:

“When the scratchies first came I thought it was because I been slumming, but then I know its because my girls old man is a cop and he tracked me, so she doused my car with crabs. I’d be mad but that was some crazy payback.” Tyler D. – Toronto, Ontario

If you have workers in your office who are bigger whores than Jabba the Vagina, consider this:

“I wasn’t sure if my boyfriend was cheating on me, so I bought some crabs and gave put them on him one night after sex. Sure enough, less than a week later [NAME REDACTED] from my office couldn’t hardly sit for five minutes with all the itching she had. Thanks Revenge Crabs, you confirmed my suspicions!” Haley Y. – Chicago, IL

If you’ve been lied to by a married/attached guy and you’re ready to “give it back”, consider this:

“I was once a whimpering house mouse of a housewife, but when my exciting (though less than wealthy) husband continued his all-night parties and attending of raves, I knew something might be up. I peppered his boxer-briefs with crabs, and even though he never said anything about the ungodly itching we both suffered, we did get a ton of hang up calls in the weeks that followed, and he started hitting me up for his party money again. Thanks Revenge Crabs, if it wasn’t for you guys and all your crabs I’d still have to wonder what’s going on, and he wouldn’t have had to find a whole new batch of pigeons to run around with.” Alley R. – Columbus, OH

If you’re just generally kind of a d!(k and love sinister revenge, consider this:

“So dude, check this out, I was in my senior year here at the University of Alberta, go pandas!, when I met this hot young philly from Phi Beta. We had a laugh and whatever but next week she’s all barking up the b!^@h-trunk of my buddy Cody. Well that’s not cool with me, so I told her I loved her, that I wanted to get serious with her, and had her back for one last night together. I sprinkled the crabs all over my bed before she came over, then scrubbed everything I own, junk included, after she left. I think I had the last laugh even before I didn’t call her back. You know? So awesome. I love this. Woo-hoo!” Zachary, W, Edmonton, Alberta

 
I don't know why they call them crabs
default_dunno.gif
They look more like tiny little lobsters.

 
and if you pluck one off and place it on a hot light bulb they blow up
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USAF 1972 need I say more
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Last edited by a moderator:
I don't know why they call them crabs :dunno They look more like tiny little lobsters.
.............................and.........................how would you know this? :huh:
Was boarded up with a bunch of fellow teens for a summer. One day a kid says " What the hell kind a bug is that on my leg!" After closer inspection from anouther youth he says. "That's a fu^%$&g crab!!!
Needless to say if you've never taken a crab bath with 30 of your not so close friends. Your not missing much !!!!! :hmmph

 
I don't know why they call them crabs :dunno They look more like tiny little lobsters.
.............................and.........................how would you know this? :huh:
Was boarded up with a bunch of fellow teens for a summer. One day a kid says " What the hell kind a bug is that on my leg!" After closer inspection from anouther youth he says. "That's a fu^%$&g crab!!!
Needless to say if you've never taken a crab bath with 30 of your not so close friends. Your not missing much !!!!! :hmmph
I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit. :o

 
In somewhat related? news..

Man accused of tucking 6 lobsters into his pants

Man accused of tucking 6 lobsters into his pants

Fortunately for him, the critters around San Diego don't have pincers

SAN DIEGO - A San Diego man accused of poaching lobsters allegedly was caught with six of the creatures stuffed down his pants.

Thirty-three-year-old Binh Quang Chau, who has been cited four times for poaching, allegedly took the lobsters from the La Jolla State Marine Conservation Area.

Department of Fish and Game warden Daryl Simmons says wardens arrested Chau when they noticed "odd bulges" in his pants. All six of the newspaper-wrapped lobsters were still alive and were returned to the ocean.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/27139637/

It is too bad these did not have pincers!

Message #2

10/11/08 10:55 PM Off with his ..ahem..head!!!

Message #4

10/11/08 10:59 PM Caught himself a case of the crabs did he?

Message #5

10/11/08 11:01 PM Like I said, it is too bad the lobsters off the San Diego Coast, in that area anyhow, do not have pincers. Not his first time poaching either.

Message #6

10/11/08 11:04 PM CUE: nitwitted morons connecting the incident to California allowing gays to marry...

Message #7

10/11/08 11:28 PM Update - Only 5 lobsters were found, and two of them did have one pincher each . . . what was "mistaken" for a "sixth lobster" was actually his . . . well, it was, uh, had been pinched SEVERAL TIMES !!!

 
http://www.revengecrabs.com/

Send Revenge Crabs To A Friend!

Pubic Lice Is What We Do

In short, we give crabs to your ex-girlfriend. No if’s, not too many and’s, but we promise a very itchy butt. You’ve got an ex, a grudge and a valid credit card with matching billing & shipping addresses, and we’ve got crabs.If you want a way to get back that doesn’t involve permanent damage or risk of personal injury or jail time, you now have a place to turn.

Imagine, if you can, that you have an ex. It might be an ex girlfriend, an ex boyfriend or ex wife or husband. Heck, it can be an ex-fling for all we care, but imagine in this crazy little hypothetical that you have an ex, whatever that may mean to you. Now imagine, if you can imagine it, that you might have some reason why you don’t like this ex of yours. What could you possibly do to get back at him or her? I have an idea, and it’s just so crazy it might work.

Give your ex crabs!

It’s an idea so horrible, regrettable and insulting that you could never directly endorse or request it, and we won’t ask you to. All we do is ask you for your billing and shipping addresses, and mail you out a tidy package of peculiar material with tiny, purple dots in it… those are live crabs, and they need only be sprinkled on the bedding or clothing of the one you once loved the most to ensure he/she sufferers the fullest wrath of those genital lice.

We have a facility in a non-descript, small-town city in upstate New York where we do all of our parasite husbandry and carefully considered selective breeding. You don’t have to “get it” or even “like it”, but just know we’re doing our very best every day to help you get back to where you deserve to be in terms of justice and respect.

If you’ve ever tasted the sweet intoxication of love, you know what it’s like to live…

If you’ve ever fought the bitter battle with the one you’ve pledged to love, you’ve felt our very pain.

If you’ve ever told that whore which cliff to jump off because of all that sleeping around she must be doing, going out dressed like that all the time.

If you’ve ever loved or bedded above your class, but felt bitter, dire resentment when you were abandoned for someone more in keeping with socio economic classing, but still wished there was something you could do to get back at him or her.

We can help

Read our pages, feel our X-Ray vision, and make the only choice that’s left; you must now buy our product of gestational pubic crab eggs, delivered fresh to your door within mere days.
Code:
Hi, Please send me a quote for sending a Spring loaded glitter crabs. My ex-wife totally deserves them.
Thanks
SN
 
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