Since we're talking about wives, can you guys give me advice as to how to tell my wife she needs to go to the f'ing gym or I'm gonna kick her out?
Thanks!
Best way - start working out yourself. Leading by example is one of the best ways to effect change. Think of how hard it is to change yourself - now imagine that someone else is trying to change you. That's what you're trying to do with your wife. Be prepared to spend *literally* years doing this, and perhaps the rest of your life.
If you work out regularly already, be really cool about it. Don't rub it in her face that you do and she doesn't. Don't even say anything to her, just be content, be happy with it. If she sees you enjoying it, that'll be the biggest advertisement that she should start.
Also - who cooks at your house? If she does, take over a little bit, and focus on the veggies & healthier dishes. Learn to cook if you don't, and make good-tasting, healthy stuff.
Just about the surest way to sabotage your intent (a shapelier wife) is to insinuate, hint, or in any way express to her that you're dissatisfied with her figure. You'll undo 1,000 good deeds with one such comment.