knapplc and the music thread

PM from Roxy:

Ok ty! I went to the woodshed since you were so kind to give me the password.  I haven’t said anything in it, I just wanted to read it.  I did not realize I was hated so much by some of the members!  Ulty said “Listen you cowards, this ain’t over, we cannot rest until Roxy’s reign of terror over huskerboard has come to an end.”  It is there if you want to read it.  I am very sorry for any wrong doing I have done and I hope they give me a chance.  Don’t they have anything else to do besides complain?  It’s sad and I am very sorry if I have been a pain.  I love this board!  Ty again for taking time for me!  Am I really a reign of terror?
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My response:

Since you haven't been in the Woodshed before, let me give you a little background on what goes on in there.  It is kind of a place for people to let out their frustrations but it is also a place where people exaggerate their statements, usually trying to be funny.  I'm sure no one really thinks you are a "reign of terror".  They are just talking about one thread where you are the main person posting.  So he probably thought if he called it a "reign of terror" others would get a laugh out of it.  But I doubt he meant any ill will by it.

For some reason some people think it's a little different that you have a thread where you are posting all the music videos but not many other people are contributing.  And a couple have suggested that there is already a similar thread called "What are you listening to right now?" that is made up of very similar content that others post to but they don't post there as often.  So there were a couple people asking if those threads should be merged together as they have pretty similar content.  Merging threads happens fairly regularly in other areas of the board.

So really it was just some discussion with a couple people who were asking questions about what is going on.  There are just as many other posters who have spoken in support of you as there were those questioning what you are posting.  And the vast majority of other posters don't have any problem with it.  So I don't think you should feel like there are a lot of people unhappy with your posts.  

There are always a few people who will complain about something no matter what it is.  I've had people complain about how many threads I've made or why I'm posting what I do in the past.  I try not to be offended by them.  I try to consider what they are saying and decide if I agree or not.  If I can see the point they are making, I'll sometimes change up how I do things a little bit to try to take their advice in a constructive way.  If I think they are just out there to complain, I just ignore them and go on.

Hope that helps!  Have a great day!
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@Mavric, your response was well-written and hopefully will help to spare her feelings. Honestly, some members have posted rather harsh criticisms of her in the Woodshed assuming she is not computer-savvy enough to figure out how to access the Shed. It would be like us openly discussing how obnoxious StPaul was on our admin forum only to find out he is joining the Mod team. Roxy does seem to take things personal, so she may be taken aback by what she finds in there.

We have singled out knapplc in this matter,  mostly because he chose to report Roxy’s Thread, but I wonder do we need to address this issue individually with other members? And if so who? Moiraine would definitely be on this list.

By the way, I will be traveling out of the country for work this week, so I will not be very involved on the board. I apologize for the poor timing give current events. @Enhance and @Mavric, I have agreed will both of your positions on this matter, so you can assume any actions moving forward, you have my support.

 
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Enhance said:
You missed like... a ton of stuff while you were gone!
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Seems appropriate.

 
Pretty spot on @Saunders

As for @Thanks_Tom RR's most recent post, my thoughts: the only members I can readily think of that seem to have an issue still are @JJ Husker, @Ulty and @Moiraine. Of those, @Moiraine is the only one who has gone to the level to create two threads about it - Going To Eat This and Going To Do That. Ulty and JJ don't seem quite as invested.

I'm torn about Moiraine's involvement. On one hand, it's trolling. On the other hand, I don't think this is really all that big of a deal, and we've already gone to some pretty silly lengths to give Roxy her playground. And knowing Moiraine, action taken against her on this will likely result in her getting far too worked up and going overboard on how we're making a ton of exceptions for Roxy and no on else. I don't know if I really want to deal with all that.

Maybe this is a good 'welcome back' decision for you @Saunders  :lol: .

 
Enhance said:
Pretty spot on @Saunders

As for @Thanks_Tom RR's most recent post, my thoughts: the only members I can readily think of that seem to have an issue still are @JJ Husker, @Ulty and @Moiraine. Of those, @Moiraine is the only one who has gone to the level to create two threads about it - Going To Eat This and Going To Do That. Ulty and JJ don't seem quite as invested.

I'm torn about Moiraine's involvement. On one hand, it's trolling. On the other hand, I don't think this is really all that big of a deal, and we've already gone to some pretty silly lengths to give Roxy her playground. And knowing Moiraine, action taken against her on this will likely result in her getting far too worked up and going overboard on how we're making a ton of exceptions for Roxy and no on else. I don't know if I really want to deal with all that.

Maybe this is a good 'welcome back' decision for you @Saunders  :lol: .
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I was with my kids on vacation, so my initial reaction is to continue the "knock that crap off" method but I don't think it will work the same on HB, lol.

Let me dig into all of it, then give it some thought.

 
Also, FWIW, Roxy just sent me this PM: 

I messaged Mavric and I told him that if the mods want to merge the music, I don’t care.  I am tired of the bickering and would like for all of us to be happy!  If you do merge them, I would really appreciate if it was noted that I didn’t mind so maybe some of the members won’t think I am the witched witch on huskerboard.  Mavric has been really nice to me in explaining stuff to me in a way that I will understand.  I was in a coma and have a head injury so sometimes it is hard for me to figure out some things.  Thank you for all the great work you and the other mods do in here!  Have a great day!
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Just reconfirming the claims of a head injury. I have no reason to disbelieve her, and that's really why I'm getting more worked up about this one than usual. Head injury stuff is pretty personal to me. If she does have some sort of brain injury, what other members are doing to her is pretty lame, but it would be wrong of us to publicly tell people why she is the way she is.

 
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Enhance said:
Also, FWIW, Roxy just sent me this PM: 

Just reconfirming the claims of a head injury. I have no reason to disbelieve her, and that's really why I'm getting more worked up about this one than usual. Head injury stuff is pretty personal to me. If she does have some sort of brain injury, what other members are doing to her is pretty lame, but it would be wrong of us to publicly tell people why she is the way she is.
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Since you have contact with her... what are your thoughts on asking for her permission to share some info to help explain the situation. We don't have to go into details, but maybe if we message the people that have an issue, and give them a brief "this is why Roxy is doing this" PM, along with a "request" for them to play nice, it might go over better.

 
Saunders said:
Since you have contact with her... what are your thoughts on asking for her permission to share some info to help explain the situation. We don't have to go into details, but maybe if we message the people that have an issue, and give them a brief "this is why Roxy is doing this" PM, along with a "request" for them to play nice, it might go over better.
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I was thinking the same thing. I'm going to ask her as politely as possible.

The only other alternative I can think of is to PM those people and say something along the lines of 'there are extenuating circumstances surrounding Roxy that we can't go into detail about, but we would appreciate your understanding and cooperation with why we are giving her some leeway. It's out of respect for her privacy that we are not sharing all the details.' Something along those lines.

I'll touch base if I hear back from Roxy but, if I don't, perhaps we go the alternative route.

 
Enhance said:
I was thinking the same thing. I'm going to ask her as politely as possible.

The only other alternative I can think of is to PM those people and say something along the lines of 'there are extenuating circumstances surrounding Roxy that we can't go into detail about, but we would appreciate your understanding and cooperation with why we are giving her some leeway. It's out of respect for her privacy that we are not sharing all the details.' Something along those lines.

I'll touch base if I hear back from Roxy but, if I don't, perhaps we go the alternative route.
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Yup, I think that's plan B if Roxy doesn't want us to share.

Plan C is we go mean Dad on them.

 
She responded, which is sort of upsetting because I was hoping to see your mean Dad.  :(   Another time, mayhaps.

Roxy sent me a really nice (and long) response saying it was totally fine for us to share whatever we want with whoever we want. I think this is probably the best route for us to go then. I'll send a PM to knapplc separately (he and I have an ongoing conversation about this), but I think we should include Moiraine, Ulty and JJ into a thread and message them.

Saunders, I don't want to throw you into the fire since you're probably still getting your feet wet on this situation after vacation. If you're OK with it, I'll send a message to those three and include you on it as well so that you can offer any additional thoughts that I may miss. Might be nice to have another mod in the chat group than just one of us.

 
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I'm perfectly fine with the way that was handled. Moirane didn't seem apologetic, but she can get over it.

On the flip side, I think it's reasonable to ask Roxy to keep her posts that are rubbing people the wrong way to specific threads within the sub-forums. I'm empathetic to her well-being, but at the same time, HB isn't her personal Pinterest board.

I think that's the best of both worlds solution, and it will keep both sides relatively happy.

 
Yeah, I sort of expected as much from Moiraine. She has taken on some occasional StPaul-esque type approaches with mods and admins, especially after the whole mansplaining thread situation a couple of years back.

100% agree with you on the bit about Roxy, too.

 
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