Jen I know you were being sarcastic in your post by including the emoticon but the reality is every speaker we've asked to come down in the past couple of years has requested that we cover all their expenses, at a minimum.
Jeff Kinney came over for free a few years ago but I picked up green fees for his wife and him at my club. Johnny Rodgers came down for free and we had absolutely no problem with him promoting a book and selling his autographs on items attendees brought to have signed. Tom Osborne came down for free in March but we covered all of his expenses to get a charter to fly down and back and provided a suite for him to change and relax if he needed (and as a plan 'b' in case the plane couldn't get back that evening due to the icy weather).
I don't have a problem with paying a stipend...other than a few contractual obligations to make appearances at specified booster gatherings, these guys are giving up personal time, usually on weekends, to address fans they wouldn't otherwise be able to meet.
GBR